Brew Bistro,
Piedmont Plaza, Ngong Road
Seemingly just
in time to enjoy one of our last sunshine-filled weekends, my friends and I
decided to have lunch at Brew Bistro & Lounge last Saturday. Despite living
a stone’s throw from “Brew”, I’ve only ever sampled from their bar menu on
nights out with friends. An extension of the Big Five Breweries Company, Brew
is best known for its wide selection of beers, all brewed on-site. With a live
DJ or band, depending on the day, Brew is a popular night spot filled with what
one would call the young and upwardly-mobile set in Nairobi; the kind of place
one goes to see and be seen.
The dining
section is only opened for lunch for groups of 20+ people and then only with a
reservation. We didn’t know this so when we got there, we were seated on the
terrace. With the management’s fairly recent decision to place banquettes along
the side of the terrace, what has resulted is a very crowded and
cluttered-looking area. We tried to sit at one of the banquettes but the
nearest table of six people was so close to us it felt almost like we were
sitting on top of each other. I am exaggerating (just the tiniest bit) but you
can definitely forget trying to have an intimate or formal meeting unless you
don’t mind other diners over-hearing your conversation. We moved on from a
banquette and settled for a table in the middle of the terrace where we had an
audience of only two to three waiters at any given time. This was definitely the lesser of two evils
so if you’re a guy trying to get out of the “friend-zone” I’d definitely not
recommend lunch at Brew. Dinner, maybe.
The menu is
pan-global, offering a fusion of French, European, and Asian cuisine. It is fairly extensive with several
appetizers and a comprehensive vegetarian section. If you’ve dined with
vegetarians before it’s hard not to feel sorry for them as most places have a
paltry selection of vegetarian dishes—you’re lucky if you find more than two
vegetarian dishes. At Brew, vegetarians can choose from a wide range of dishes
including lovely sounding ones like the porcini risotto (a risotto with porcini
mushrooms, parmesan cheese, and some black truffle), or the naughty-sounding
magic mushroom threesome (a Chinese steamed bun with marinated mushrooms,
truffle oil, and truffle cream).
Meat lover that
I am, I turned to the ‘Butcher’s Block’ section. I ordered the rump steak with
a side of hand-cut chips and the honey, rosemary and thyme sauce. My friend
ordered the ‘Tournedos Oscar’ which is a round and thick cut of fillet beef
stuffed with lobster accompanied with asparagus, rosemary potatoes, and a
béarnaise sauce. We both ordered our meat medium-rare—more rare than medium.


For drinks, I had a yummy and oh-so-refreshing glass of fresh passion fruit
juice while my friend had the Simpils beer-a German pilsner-style beer
crafted and brewed in-house. The drinks menu is very extensive, comprising beers,
more cocktails than I care to count, all of four mocktails, liqueurs, shooters,
teas and coffee (boozy or otherwise), and other soft drinks. Wine lovers are
also very well catered for as they have an extensive wine list with their cellar
boasting more than 1,000 bottles of wine. If you’re tired of Nairobi
establishments where you can only order wine as sweet or dry, ordering wine
here makes for a refreshing change.
Our meals were
on the table in at least half an hour. The presentation of meals was excellent
and I was particularly delighted by the little ‘building’ they’d constructed
out of my chips. My steak was perfectly done to my preference and the sauce
made for a tasty accompaniment. I tasted my friend’s tournedos (yes, I am that
person sticking their forks into everyone’s plate and trying everything
out) and I instantly wished I’d ordered the same. The tournedos was perfectly
salted, and so tender it was almost like chewing a meat-flavored
marshmallow—my taste buds didn’t know what had hit them. From that point, my
steak tasted rather like sawdust in comparison. In all fairness, had I never
tasted my friend’s dish I’d have been raving about my steak. Fortunately for my
friend, he practically inhaled his meal so I didn’t have another opportunity to
foist a chunk of his meat onto my own plate. My poor steak long forgotten, my
friend and I literally had a full-on conversation about just how good his
tournedos was. As we did so, the chef came to greet the diners at the table
behind us. I was quite pleased to see the chef is nicely chubby. Am I the only
one who thinks a chef that looks like he enjoys the fruit of his labor can be
trusted? I mean, if he thinks his food is good, then we’re more likely
to also be convinced. Just me, then? Yes, no? Finding a skinny chef, in my
opinion, is akin to finding out that either Ben or Jerry of Ben & Jerry
ice-cream fame is lactose-intolerant and a vegan to boot! It simply makes no
sense.
Despite the
cluttered ambience and odd influx of flies on the terrace, the attentive
waiters and low-volume music made for a nice-enough experience. Because where
two or three Kenyans are gathered, one is bound to be late, the straggler of
the group came long after our lunch plates had been cleared. She ordered the chicken
wings and a cocktail called “Mamba”, a drink made of dark rum, spiced rum,
Sambuca, Bacardi, cachaça, and some fresh orange and pineapple juice which is
probably just to ensure one doesn’t end up plastered on the floor! If you’re
after a proper stiff drink, that’s the one to go for. Happy hour is from 5-7 pm
and there is a BOGOF on all beers and mojitos. By 6 pm the place was starting
to fill up and the music’s volume was turned all the way up and our lazy, quiet
Saturday was done with just like that. I went from being suitably dressed for
the day to looking wholly inappropriate compared to all the girls in their
skyscraper heels and short frocks (I quite like that word ‘frock’). By 8 pm,
the party was in full swing with the DJ playing the latest R&B and hip hop
hits from the night before. On a side note, do DJs just assume people won’t go
to the same place two nights in a row? One of my friends, having been there
only the Friday before, knew the whole playlist!
I am yet to have
my proper dining experience at Brew as I hear the dining section and chef’s bar
make for a great experience. I’ll be sure to try both out, make my own
judgments, and share with y’all. In the meantime, I’ll be here dreaming about
the Tournedos Oscar!